If you’re located in Australia, you might like to try my Online Couples Therapy service.
This could be a good option for you if:
- you’re busy and would prefer to save the travel time for something else.
- you are your partner are in a long-distance relationship but want to do the work together.
- it just feels more comfortable for you to do the work in your own space rather than my office.
- you have small children at home and can’t get away.
- you live in a part of the country where you haven’t been able to find a couples therapist you want to see.
- you are experiencing the kinds of problems Couples therapy has been show to assist with.
The kinds of problems Couples Therapy is known to help with:
- communication problems: this might include difficulty expressing wants and needs in an optimal way, difficulty talking about challenging topics, such as sex, money, and family.
- difficulties working through conflict: you might have trouble raising issues and generally prefer to brush things under the carpet, or you might have very loud and passionate fights. Either way, you are aware that you don’t have the skills to solve the problems that arise in your relationship.
- infidelity: there has been an emotional or sexual affair and this has resulted in stress for you both and potentially trauma for the partner who was betrayed. Couples therapy can help you move through the aftermath of this and rebuild trust as long as the affair is over and both partners are committed to rebuilding the relationship.
- intimacy issues: A lack of physical and emotional intimacy can put a strain on a relationship. Couples therapy can help you to find new ways to talk together that will assist you to find the way forward.
- premarital counselling: Couples therapy has been show to support couples before they get married by helping them acquire new skills and identify and work towards solving any potential issues that might arise in their marriage.
It’s probably not the best option for you if:
- dislike technology and are not confident in installing and using Zoom.
- don’t have a computer and plan to do therapy on a phone – I will probably look too small to you and you won’t be able to catch enough of my non-verbal cues to feel safe and connected with me.
- you just prefer to be in the same room with your therapist.
- you or your partner have an untreated mental health condition, like anxiety, depression or an active addiction.
- you or your partner have had an affair and are unmotivated or unable to give it up and return fully to the primary relationship.
- you or your partner have already decided you’d be better off getting a divorce.
If you stay with regular Couples Therapy sessions, you can expect to:
- improve your communication skills
- develop a greater sense of closeness and intimacy
- increase your capacity to talk about hard things
- find new ways to talk about the issues that come up again and again
- developing an understanding of how to process disagreements
- find ways to recover from fights more quickly and to fight better
- restore trust & commitment
- develop a greater appreciation of your partner
How this works:
I practice the Gottman method of Couples Therapy and am trained to level 3 in this approach. This is a well-researched and supportive approach designed to help people build on their strenghts and develop new skills to increase the health of their relationships. This is what it looks like:
Phase 1: Assessment
We start with an in-depth look at your relationship:
- The Joint Interview: we’ll spend most of this time exploring your history together as a couple.
- The Written Assessment: you’ll answer questions about topics that include your friendship and intimacy, how well you believe you know your partner, how you manage your emotions and conflict together, how you share your values and goals, and what gives meaning to your lives. There are additional questions about parenting, housework, finances, trust, and individual areas of concern.
- The Individual Interviews: we split this session in two and I’ll meet each of you individually. This gives me a chance to get to know you better and ask any questions I might have based on your responses in the written assessment.
- The Feedback and Planning Session: We’ll review your results and talk about the strengths we can build on along with the areas that we can develop to ensure an improvement in the health of your relationship.
Phase 2: Treatment
The Gottman’s research suggests that massing the sessions as much as possible at the start of treatment gets the best outcomes, so we’ll be keeping this in mind as we plan how frequently we meet and in what format.
Phase 3: Tapering off
Once couples have gotten to the point where they’re using the skills and engaging differently outside of sessions, we start to taper off. We bring sessions to a close at the point that the couple have fully integrated the changes and are confident of their abilities to engage with their partner in healthy ways.